Mario's Murder Mystery
by Marioman174
Summary: That's it! The story is finally finished! After 11 long chapters and 1 not so long one, the story is complete! YAY! With two alternate endings that I will eventually upload. So it's not over yet!
1. The Crime

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story, they are property of Nintendo

Mario's Murder Mystery

Chapter One: The Crime

Place of Crime: Shroom-Mart, Mushroom Kingdom Supermarket

Day of Crime: May 24, 2007.

Time of Crime: 7:59pm (one minute before closing)

Suspects:

Mario, Luigi, Peach, Daisy, Yoshi, Bowser, DK, Wario, Birdo and Toad.

Crime:

At one minute to closing, at the Mushroom Kingdom supermarket Shroom-Mart, one Toadette was shot in the head by a hand gun.

Clues:

No windows were shattered and no one entered the building.

The culprit had to be in the building at the at the time.

11 people were in the building:

Toad the cashier

Wario the manager

Toadette the victim (of course she doesn't count this was murder, not suicide).

And the others listed under suspects.

Alibis:

Mario:

"Luigi and I were just about to pay Toad for everything we bought that day. We were in a hurry because the store was about to close, and I dropped my wallet. As I bent over to pick it up, there was a loud thud, a scream, and then Toadette was dead…"

Luigi:

"Ok, I was with my brother at the time. Mario was busy paying Toad, meanwhile I was reading an article in the newspaper about Chain Chomps running loose in Toad Town. Half way through the article, I had to sneeze. Right as I sneezed, I heard the gunshot."

Peach:

"At the time, I was with Daisy. I wasn't shopping, but since Chain Chomp's were running around Toad Town, Toadsworth thought it would be safer. So I was leaning against the wall next to the door, talking to Daisy. It was almost time to close, so I got up off the wall. Except my high heels weren't on the ground all the wall, and I fell off balance and fell, taking Daisy with me. It was then, that I heard the gun shot."

Daisy:

"Let's see, I was with Peach, I already paid Toad for what I bought, but figured I'd stay behind to talk to Peach. We had only one minute until the store closed, and had to leave, so Peach got up, but tripped over herself and fell on top of me. The two of us then fall to the ground. After we hit the ground, we heard the gun."

Yoshi:

"Hmm, I was out looking for some watermelons, unfortunately, Shroom-Mart was out of watermelons for the week, so I had to look for something else to eat. I was looking in the freezer in the back in hopes of finding some ice cream. I was squatting to see the bottom shelf of the freezer, when the shot was heard. I even banged my head on the freezer door because of it."

Bowser:

"What? The only people I kill are Koopa Troopas and that's by dipping them in lava! I don't use guns! Guns are for people who don't have my brawn. Besides I can't use guns, my fingers are too thick. But if you must have my story, I was busy in the beverage section of the freezers. I bent over to grab my drink, and then the gun was fired."

DK:

"I wasn't anywhere near Toadette. I couldn't see her, so I didn't even know where she was. I was over by the fruits, picking up a bunch of bananas. Normally, I'd be talking to Yoshi, but since there were no watermelons in the fruit section, Yoshi was somewhere else. I began to walk away, but I stubbed my toe on the wall, fairly hard. I dropped the bananas, and hopped away from the wall. I landed on one of the bananas I dropped moments before, and slipped. When I hit the ground, I heard two thuds. Me landing, then the gun being fired."

Wario:

"I would never hurt a paying customer. Besides I never left my office. I was sitting at my desk watching TV, when I got very tired even though it was only 7:58. You see, the night before my brother, Waluigi, threw a huge party. I, of course, attended. It lasted until at least 5 in the morning. And my store opens at 7 so I only got 2 hours to sleep. I was very tired, so I put my head down, then suddenly, there was a bang. That's when the gun went off."

Birdo:

"I didn't hurt Toadette! I was going to make a delicious omelet for dinner, when I realized I was out of eggs! And of course I can't use MY eggs, so I had to run out for just a few minutes to get them. When I got to the egg aisle, I picked up a dozen eggs, and then the gun was fired. I turned around, and saw Toadette, laying there, in a puddle of blood."

Toad:

"Toadette was my girlfriend, so no, I didn't do it. I was with Mario and Luigi. They were paying for 2 boxes of spaghetti, one box of ziti and three bottles of tomato sauce. The cost was exactly $10.58. Mario dropped his wallet, and bent over to pick it up. Meanwhile Luigi was about to sneeze. I bent over to pick up a tissue from under the counter when the gun was fired."

Toadette:

"……………"

Well, that covers Chapter One, Sorry if it was a little boring, but it should get better. Please Review and tell who you think the killer is, or who you want it to be.


	2. Investigators

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters, and I never will.

Mario's Murder Mystery

Chapter Two: Investigators

11:42 AM, May 25th, The Shroom-Mart store has been closed off by police. Locking the suspects in the building with two painta police.

Policemen 1: So, let me get this straight…Toadette was shot in the head by one of you, while she was buying milk?

Policemen 2: Hmm, well, with no other clues, then I suppose this case could be unsolvable.

Policemen 1: We're going to head back to the HQ, to figure everything out, but we've set up cameras everywhere in the store, they are going to send us live pictures of what you all are doing.

Mario: Would it be ok if Luigi and I tried to figure this out while you're gone?

Policemen 2: Um, yeah sure whatever.

Policemen 1: Make a note of that, it might come in handy for later…

The two policemen unlocked the door, left the building, turned around, nodded their head, then relocked the door.

Mario: Ok, so let's see here. Toadette was getting milk, which puts her at the beverage section of the freezer. Making Bowser our prime suspect.

Luigi: That's strike one.

Bowser: What!?! You can't blame me just because I was near Toadette!

Mario: Look Bowser, you are only the prime suspect, not only because you were in the same section, but you are also the only one with a motive to kill Toadette.

Bowser: And what would that be!?!

Mario: You're evil.

Luigi: Ooh. Strike two.

Bowser: What about Yoshi? He was in the freezer section too.

Mario: I know, that's why he's the second suspect.

Luigi: But we can't forget Birdo, DK or Wario, all three of them were all alone.

Yoshi: Oh yeah? How could we have snuck the gun in? We don't have pockets! You guys should be prime suspects. You two, the princesses and Wario, are the ones with pockets.

Toad: Ouch. He got you there.

Luigi: Oh yeah? Well, Toad, what about you?

Toad: What? I don't have pockets!

Luigi: No, I mean you could have a gun back behind the counter and no one would know!

DK: We're not getting anywhere, all we know, is that all of us are suspects!

Mario: That's true, however, seeing as Luigi, Peach, Daisy, Toad and I were all in the same area, it is less likely that any of us did it.

DK: What!?! That's not true! You said it yourself! You were bending over to pick up your wallet! Maybe you shot the gun from the floor!

Mario: What about Toad, he was right there!

Bowser: He was getting a tissue for Luigi. That must be it! You two are the guilty ones! That's why you wanted to become the detectives, so that you could make yourselves seem less suspicious.

Birdo: Well, it isn't going to work! It was you two confess!

Yoshi: GUYS! Settle down, we can't just assume who it was! We need proof, until we get enough proof to know who it was, we're just going to have to try to get along.

Toad: There's just one thing I don't get…why Toadette?

Mario: I don't know…

Luigi: What if…hypothetically, what if…the killer, wasn't aiming for…Toadette, but Toadette just happened to be in the way….

That's where chapter 2 ends. Don't forget to guess who you think it is, or who you want it to be.


	3. Guilt Trip

Disclaimer: I don't now, nor will I ever, own any of these characters.

Mario's Murder Mystery

Chapter 3: The Guilty Trip

11:57 am, May 25th.

Mario: So, how are we going to figure this out?

Luigi: I don't even know if we can…maybe we should just let the police take care of things.

Mario: But what if you're right about Toadette being hit by crossfire? We need to at least figure out who the target is!

Luigi: Well, my guess would be, it was either Yoshi, or Bowser. I mean they were in the same aisle as Toadette.

Mario: Yes, but, we don't know what angle the shot was fired, it could've been fired from any aisle.

DK: Look, as much as I'd love to help out…I have to go to the bathroom right now.

DK ran off toward the restroom.

Mario: Hey, that gave me an idea! If we all stay together, then the killer won't be able to kill anyone without the rest of us, plus the police, knowing.

Luigi: Well, what if its DK? He's in not with the rest of us!

Mario: I know, but with everyone knowing it would be him…do you think he'd do it?

Luigi: I don't know, but, if it IS DK, who would he be aiming at to kill?

Toad: It could be any of us!

The 9 suspects in this room huddled together.

Birdo: Maybe if we stay close he won't shoot, he probably won't want to hurt, or kill, another innocent person would he?

Yoshi: Guys, DK's my friend, I know him, he wouldn't harm anyone, would he…?

Suddenly, there was a crash, as a box of powdered donuts fell off the shelf, 4 aisles down, spilling powdered sugar everywhere.

Wario: WHAT WAS THAT!?!

Mario: Relax, it was just something falling off the aisle divider thing.

Luigi: No! Don't relax, it isn't possible for an inanimate object to just fall…there must be inertia present for an inanimate object to fall.

Bowser: Inertia?

Luigi: It's force. When you push something you are applying inertia.

Mario: In other words, something had to have touched the donuts in order for them to fall! And by something I mean a big hairy ape! He must be the killer, otherwise, why would he lie about going to the bathroom?

Luigi: Well, he could have hit it on his way to the bathroom.

Daisy: Then why did it only fall now?

Yoshi: Because if an object is just barely far enough to fall off a shelf, it might take a couple seconds before it falls.

The group of suspects were so busy arguing, they hadn't noticed the gun coming around the corner of the aisle 4 aisles down.

Bowser: DK left 2 minutes ago, don't you think that if he hit that box of donuts they would've fallen-

BANG! The gun was fired. As 8 of the 9 people looked toward the sound, the 9th person was hit, right in the stomach.

Peach: TOAD!!!

Bowser and Wario watched the gun drop to the ground as the assassin ran away. Mario, Yoshi and Birdo looked down at Toad in horror, as blood began to run out of his bullet hole, Peach, Daisy and Luigi closed their eyes, they couldn't watch their best friend die….

Yoshi: DK's going to pay for this…

And that's the end of Chapter 3...very sad, I know, I was very reluctant on killing Toad. But death has no mercy…


	4. After Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I still don't own any of these characters. And I still never will

Note from me: Sorry it took so long to update but I've had school project, after school project, even with a week left of school, my teachers have no mercy!

Chapter 4: After Chapter 3

As two painta police took Toad's body out of Shroom mart, DK returned from the 'bathroom'

DK: OK guys I'm back. What happened?

Yoshi: Jerk, you killed Toad!

DK: What? Why would I kill Toad?

Mario: Because, so there.

DK: What proof do you have?

Mario: Well, you were the only one not with us plus, you haven't always been too nice especially to me, what, did you miss your target!?! I'm over HERE! Are you trying to steal my girlfriend NOW too!?! I swear you big hairy ass! I will ki-

Peach hit Mario in the head with her frying pan.

Mario: What happened?

Peach: You were rambling…

Mario: Oh.

Meanwhile DK escaped to another part of the store.

Luigi: Great, now he could be anywhere, around any corner! What do we do?

Yoshi: You guys look for him, I'm going to eat some donuts.

Wario: Save some for me!

Yoshi walked over to the aisle the box of donuts fell off of a few aisles down. As he looked down the aisle he stopped, stared, then gasped.

Yoshi: Guys! Check this out!

As the other 7 suspects (of course DK was still no where to be found) looked down the aisle, they noticed that whoever shot Toad stepped in the powdered sugar, and left footprints as they ran away. However, these footprints were WAY too small to be DK's. They were small, and circular footprints.

Mario: Wait, these can't be DK's, they're not the right shape, let alone size!

Luigi: This doesn't add up, DK was the only one not with us at the time, so who could've left these?

Bowser: They look an awful lot like Mario and Luigi's shoes.

Daisy: No, they're too big.

Peach: Maybe DK did it to make himself less suspicious.

Birdo: How would he do that?

Peach: I don't know, DK's not only got brawn but he's got brains too, I'm sure he could figure out a way to do it.

Mario: Wario, don't you sell boots in this store? Maybe he picked some up.

Luigi: But, if that is what he did, then how did he fit his feet in them? They're like 5 sizes too small.

Yoshi: Maybe he used a coconut, this is about the size of a coconut.

???: Actually, the footprints, are mine…

A voice came from behind the eight suspects. They turned around, and couldn't believe who they were looking at.

Well, that's a small cliffhanger, sorry, but you'll have to wait until Chapter Five to see whose feet made the prints.


	5. After What Happened Before

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And now back to Mario's Murder Mystery Chapter 5…

Mario's Murder Mystery

Last Time on 'MARIO'S MURDER MYSTERY' Toad and Toadette: dead; DK: Innocent and missing; Mario and Luigi: Stumped; Everyone else: startled by who killed Toad. Bob Johnson: Off in Miami.

Chapter 5: After what Happened Before

Mario: Wait…YOU killed Toad?

Toad's assassin: That is right it was me. TOADETTE'S GHOST!

Bowser faints and falls on top of Birdo killing her.

Luigi: Well, um, ok.

Mario: See, see? Bowser killed Birdo! He IS a murderer!

Luigi: Um, I think that's strike three…

Yoshi: Well, strike three traditionally follows strike two, and you did after all get strikes one and two in chapter 2.

Wario: That means it was him! GET HIM!

Toadette: STOP! Doesn't anyone care about why I killed Toad?

Daisy (annoyed): Sighs Sure…

Toadette: Ok, I was trying to kill the person who killed me, (which means no, I didn't kill myself). But my crappy aim made me miss and hit Toad.

Mario: Wait, if you know who killed you, why don't you tell us? Then we can kill them!

Toadette: I can't, it's against the rules of death.

Yoshi: RULES OF DEATH!?!

Peach: They can't make this easy, can they?

Bowser: Zzzz. mumbles

Wario: This is giving me a headache. Can you go get me an Aspirin, Toadette?

Toadette: Why should I?

Wario: You're a ghost, you can't die again.

Toadette: No.

Mario: Can you at least give us a hint to who the murderer is?

Toadette: The rules of death allow only one hint, and this is it: he/she is still alive.

Luigi: Thanks…I guess that crosses off Birdo.

Mario: DK too, he was gone when Toadette killed Toad, so if she was aiming at DK, she really does have crappy aim.

Luigi: But, wait if you're a ghost, how were you able to track the powdered sugar?

Toadette: Because I'm awesome, now shut up!

Mario: But, I don't understand! What are the rules of death?

Toadette: Rule #4,694 stats that I can only reveal the following two rules: rule #1, I can't reveal who my killer was; and rule #4,694, I can only talk about this rule and rule #1.

Peach: How many rules are there?

Toadette: I am unauthorized to answer that question, it is against the rules.

Yoshi: Are you kidding me? What kind of stupid rules are these?

Suddenly there was a bright flash, and the grim reaper appeared.

GR: I am sorry Toadette, but it is time for you to come back to the underworld.

Yoshi: What's that?

GR: I cannot tell you becau-

Yoshi: It's against the rules, I know.

The Grim Reaper and Toadette disappeared, in another bright flash.

Luigi: Now what?

Mario: Now…we're back where we started, except, we know it wasn't Toad or Birdo. And we think it wasn't DK…

Meanwhile for no reason at all, Bullet Bill exploded and died.

So who was it? You can guess now, but you'll find out later. We're down to eight suspects: Mario, Luigi, Peach, Daisy, Yoshi, DK, Wario, Bowser (who is still fainted on top of Birdo).


	6. Search and Destroy

Disclaimer: I don't own anything from this story.

Another AN: I went on a family vacation for about a week, so I couldn't update this story

Anyway, on with the story

Mario's Murder Mystery

Chapter Six: Search and Destroy

Mario and Luigi paced back and forth, rethinking everything that went on that day, hoping they missed something. Peach and Daisy were huddled in a corner frightened, rocking back and forth muttering to themselves, trying to calm them selves down. Yoshi was too nervous to eat, well just a little. DK was still missing somewhere else in the store. Wario was hiding in his office cowardly. Bowser woke up and was forced to search for DK, (he does after all have a diamond-hard shell, not to mention his even harder head). And lastly, Bob Johnson left Miami for his cousin's apartment building.

Luigi: This doesn't make sense! Who the hell was Toadette shooting at!?!

Mario: Luigi, calm down, we aren't going to figure this out if we're all pissed off. Let's just review what happened.

Luigi: What's there to review!?!

Mario: I don't know what's been going on all day? Alibis? Anything?

Luigi: There's nothing to review from today that will get us anywhere. And all I know from the alibis is that everyone was looking down at the time….

Mario: But, there must have been something that we missed.

Luigi: Like what?

Mario: I don't know…

Bowser (from across the store): Guys! I found DK! And…well, just come here!

As the other four people plus Yoshi ran across the store (Wario couldn't hear from his office), they came to an immediate stop when they saw Bowser. He found DK alright, but DK had been pushed into a shelf with forks, knives, spoons and the occasional toaster. DK had knocked the shelf off balance and caused several knives and a pair of forks had stabbed him, at least six spoons were tangled in his fur, and a toaster smashed his foot, until he kicked the bucket…and toaster. However, he was holding a small piece of paper in his hand.

Mario: Wait what's that in his hand?

Luigi: It's a piece of paper, maybe he wrote down the name of the killer.

Luigi picked up the piece of paper and read it, it was blank.

Luigi: It's blank, both sides, nothing.

Mario: Oh, wait a second! Bowser was the only one over here at the time DK was killed!

Luigi: Case closed!

Yoshi: Bowser! It WAS you!

Bowser: No it wasn't! I found him here like this!

Luigi: Do I have to remind you of strike 1, 2 and 3? 1. You're evil. 2. You were in the same section as Toadette. And 3. You killed Birdo.

Bowser: Hey! Birdo wasn't my fault! I fainted!

Luigi: Stop denying it, you killed Toadette, she came back for revenge but accidentally shot Toad, and faked fainting to kill Toadette!

Bowser: I didn't kill anyone except Birdo, and I fell on her **accidentally**! What's your excuse!?!

Mario: What are you talking about?

Bowser: In Super Mario bros 2. You killed Birdo twice every world!

Luigi: It wasn't our fault!

Bowser: Not to mention, you kill all of my minions! You killed Kamek. Need I go on?

Mario began to get nervous now.

Mario: B-But that doesn't count…

Luigi: Yeah, that was self-defense!

Bowser: What are you talking about? How is that self-defense?

Yoshi: Because your stupid minions were attacking them. It's either kill or be killed.

Bowser: You stay out of this!

Yoshi: Why should I?

Daisy: You can't tell him to stay out of anything!

Bowser: This is between me and the Mario brothers, everyone else, shut the hell up!

Mario: You don't get to tell anyone what to do!

Luigi: Everyone just shut up for a second! I'm trying to figure this out!

Mario: I thought we already did? Bowser's guilty end of story.

Luigi: I thought so too, but…no it wasn't Bowser…it was…

That's the end of Chapter six HAHAHAHA! Cliffhanger, an evil cliffhanger!

Luigi: NO! No more cliffhangers! I'm going to announce the killer right now! THE KILLER IS BIRDO!

Several gasps were heard.

Yoshi: But, Birdo died.

Luigi: She died at least 10 times in Super Mario Bros 2, but it didn't stop her from coming back later!

Mario: That's true.

Luigi: Besides I have proof that says it was her!

Me: And I'm sure we're all excited to see or hear it, NEXT CHAPTER

Mario (ignoring me): What kind of evidence?

Me: Are you guys ignoring me?

Luigi: All kinds, that I can't believe I missed.

Me: That's it! I'm ending this chapter right NOW! (after a word from our sponsors).

Sponsors: Mario's Murder Mystery was brought to you by Marioman174, the same author who brought you Yoshi World (Super Smash Bros Melee). And the same author who will bring you Mario and Luigi, Past and Present (coming soon to a website near you).


	7. Climatic Chase

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these games, I don't plan to own any of these games, and I never will own any of these games, however I do PWN all of these games.

Mario's Murder Mystery

Chapter Seven: The Climatic Chase

Me: Ok, now you may proceed.

Luigi: Anyway, the clues that I missed that prove Birdo's guilty are: 1. According to the Alibis, Birdo was the only one of us, not on the ground, she was also the only one of us who saw Toadette, after she died.

Yoshi: But, she said she turned around and saw Toadette…

Mario: It's called lying, I hear it's all the rage for criminals.

Luigi: Mario, shut up, we don't need your sarcasm.

Wario: What about me?

Luigi: What about you?

Wario: Can I be sarcastic.

Luigi: No, and not just because I don't want you to be sarcastic, but I think your feeble mind is unable to be sarcastic. Anyway, as I was saying, Birdo didn't lie. She shot the gun, the bullet must've ricocheted off something and hit Birdo. The question is, what.

Peach: I don't think we care what it bounced off.

Luigi: You're probably right, anyway, more proof I found was what was Birdo doing in the egg aisle.

Daisy: Shopping for eggs for an omelet.

Luigi: But Birdo doesn't eat eggs!

Mario: Aha! It was Birdo!

Just then two Pianta Police smashed through the door.

Police Guy 1: I think we've figured out this whole case!

Police Guy 2: Yes, we were reviewing all the clues we found so far. And all our notes point at…you two!

The police officer points at Mario and Luigi.

Mario: US!?! What are you talking about!?!

Luigi: We didn't do anything!

Police Guy 1: But! Our notes clearly say it was you two!

Luigi: How does it point at us? Read your notes, what do they say?

Police Guy 1: Let's see. Aha. Clue #1: Mario and Luigi wanted to be investigators…SUUUUUUSPICIOUS!

Luigi: Is that it?

Mario: That wasn't even a clue! Come on! We figured out who the real killer is! NO! You can't do this!

The two police wrestled Mario and Luigi to the ground, they put a pair of handcuffs on both brothers, then pulled the duo out of the door.

Peach: Wow, Mario's been arrested for something he hasn't done…again.

Yoshi: Forget about that! This is getting serious!

Bowser: Why is it any different then before?

Yoshi: The police think they've solved the crime right?

Bowser: Yeah…

Yoshi: That means that they are going to unlock the doors, right?

Peach: And without the doors being locked…Birdo can…escape…

Wario: And without the Mario brothers, who's going to catch her? I never thought I'd say this, but, I want them back…

Daisy: Wait, you're rich, right? Well, why not use your money to bail them out of jail?

Wario: I don't want them back anymore…

Peach: Guys! Mario and Luigi aren't the only ones who have defeated Birdo before!

Bowser: Well, yeah that's true, but Toad's already died…

Peach: I meant ME! I've killed Birdo before!

Yoshi: Yes, well, knowing her, she's going to run back to Subcon, get a huge army of Tweeters, Pidgets, Shy Guys and well, the rest of War's army.

Suddenly, the group of the ex-suspects heard the front door open.

Bowser: SHE ESCAPED!

Meanwhile at court

Judge: Call your first witness.

Pianta Lawyer: I call myself.

The Pianta Lawyer takes off his lawyer suit revealing the Police officer suit.

Pianta Police/Lawyer: Do I promise to tell the truth, all of the truth, and nothing but the truth? Yes. Did I see them kill anyone? No, but! I did take very careful notes and I watched the police monitors closely. All my clues pointed at them!

Mario: I abject!

Judge: On what grounds?

Mario: He only had one note! And it had nothing to do with the case!

Judge: Overruled! Since you two are not Piantas I sentence you, to…90 days in jail.

A jury member walks over to the judge.

Jury Guy: You can't decide that yet, we have to decide if they're guilty first.

Judge: Fine, how does the jury feel?

Jury: Guilty!

Judge: I sentence Mario to 90 days, and Luigi to 5 years in jail.

Luigi: Wait what?

Judge: He saved my island from being destroyed by Bowser, I can't sentence him to 5 years!

A second jury member approaches the judge.

2nd Jury Guy: But, he was being punished at the time, he was unwillingly cleaning the island.

Judge: This is taking to long, just sentence them to death, I don't care…

To be continued…

Oh no! Mario and Luigi are going to be killed! Bi-

Jury: Your honor, death by what?

Judge: Ugh, will I ever get out of here?

Jury: Yes, once you explain how they should be killed.

Judge: Death by…dropped off a cliff that's not a real option but, that's okay…

Now, to be continued…

Oh no! Mario and Luigi are going to be killed by being dropped off a cliff! Birdo escaped! Bob Johnson fell down a manhole and is lost in an enchanted forest, with giant centipedes! Yoshi is hungry! And I am too. I'm going to get something to eat…


	8. Climatic Chase Part 2

Disclaimer: I don't own anything here so stop telling me I do.

AN: This is a slightly boring chapter, but please it isn't too long, and don't stop reading my story because of one bad chapter, I'm tired and bored so just R&R, I may remake this chapter later if I feel like it.

Another AN: Will Mario and Luigi escape their death sentences? Will the others catch Birdo? Will I ever get a life? Let's read on, and find out.

Mario's Murder Mystery

Chapter Eight: The Climatic Chase, Part 2

Yoshi: Ok, here's the plan…

Bowser: Why do we need to hear the plan? We helped make the plan…

Yoshi: Well, the readers weren't here, so we have to tell them.

Wario: Weren't we going to whisper it so they couldn't hear it anyway?

Bowser: And why do you get to explain everything?

Yoshi: Because I'm the leader.

Peach: No you're not!

Daisy: Yeah! I'm the leader!

Wario: No! I am!

Yoshi: Guys! Guys! Let's just have a vote.

Peach: Ok, I vote for myself.

Daisy: Me.

Yoshi: Yoshi

Wario: Myself, MWA HA HA!

Bowser: So, I'm the deciding vote? Someone's going to have to change their vote, because my vote goes to me!

Peach: Ok, let's start over. I vote for me!

Daisy: Me!

Yoshi: Me…

Wario: ME!

Bowser: Me…

MM174: This could take a while, we'll check back in with them later, for now, let's check in as the Marios prepare to 'check out'.

Luigi: Wait, why can't you just kill Mario? I'm to young to die!

Mario: Luigi, shut up. You're not helping.

Police/Lawyer Pianta: Both of ya shut up! We're almost to the top!

Luigi: Mario, before we die, I just wanted to tell you, when we were in the 2nd grade, Pauline really was the one who ate your last cookies, I just didn't want to tell you.

Mario: Oh, because the week after, it was me who took your SpongeBob CD.

Luigi: I know, just because you're an idiot, doesn't mean I am too.

Mario: What!?! I'm not a idiot!

Luigi: AN idiot.

Mario: Shut up!

Luigi: No you shut up!

Mario: You shut up!

Luigi: No you shut up!

Mario: You shut up!

MM174: Wow, this is a boring chapter…there must be something going on that won't give me a headache like these idiots are…oh I know!

Meanwhile, Bob Johnson was lost deep within an enchanted forest!

Bob: No, I was just there, that tree, is it the one I passed two minutes ago? Oh man, I'm hopelessly lost! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

MM174: Ahh! This is giving me a headache too! We're going back to the leader argument.

Peach: Ok, this time, no one is allowed to vote for themselves. I vote for Daisy.

Daisy: Peach.

Yoshi: Peach.

Wario: Bowser.

Bowser: Wario, I guess…

Peach: That means I'm the leader. Ok, first, we have to go save Mario and Luigi! Go!

MM174: Does that mean we have to back to the idiot convention on the mountain?

Mario: You shut up!

Luigi: No you shut up!

Police/ Lawyer Pianta: NO! You BOTH shut up! And someone get me an Aspirin!

The 2nd Police Guy who hasn't had any lines in a while runs out and returns a couple minutes later with some Aspirin for me and the Police/ Lawyer Pianta.

Then the Police People reached the top of the mountain. Mario and Luigi looked down and gulped. The Lawyer/ Police Pianta kicked them both in the back, and the Brothers fell.

Meanwhile in Subcon

Birdo: I need your help…

???: What's in it for me?

Birdo: World Domination?

???:…excellent.

Meanwhile somewhere else

Bowser: Are we there yet?

Peach: Don't make me turn this group around!

Wario: But we've been walking for 2 minutes…

Meanwhile in the Enchanted Forest

Bob Johnson: I'm hopelessly lost! Where do I go! I'm never going to-

Bob stops short noticing a light at the end of the tunnel, he races to the light and finally leaves the forest, out of the corner of his eye, he sees a sign.

Sign: The Forest of Illusions, do not enter unless you have Delusions.

Bob reads the sign then thinking the rhyme was catchy, yet disturbing, scans the environment for any signs of intelligent life, unfortunately intelligent life does not exist, so he eventually decided to head towards Peach's Castle.

MM174: This was a boring chapter, I couldn't write anything entertaining because I'm half-asleep, it's like 4 in the morning, I couldn't sleep and felt like passing the time somehow.


	9. Climatic Chase Part 3

Disclaimer: How many times do I have to tell you? I don't own these characters!

Last time on Mario's Murder Mystery:

Mario and Luigi: Arrested. And thrown off a cliff.

Peach, Daisy, Yoshi, Wario and Bowser: Going to try to save the Doomed Duo.

Birdo: In Subcon recruiting…

Wait, why am I reminding you of what happened? You should've read it already, and if you don't remember, go reread it.

Another AN: I'm not tired this time so, the story shouldn't be too bad…maybe.

Mario's Murder Mystery

Chapter Nine: The Climatic Chase Part 3

In the sky nearing ground.

As Mario and Luigi looked down at the approaching ground, Luigi began to cry.

Mario: My life is flashing before my eyes! And now that I look at it, I can't help but wonder, WHY did I become an investigator?

Luigi: I don't know, but why did you bring me into it?

Mario: Because we're the Mario Bros we stick together.

Luigi: Yep, we even die together.

Mario: Those damn police! They're going to pay for t-

Just then, Mario and Luigi crashed into the ground.

Meanwhile a couple thousand feet away, and going in the wrong direction the other main people.

Daisy: We're lost.

Peach: No we're not!

Yoshi: Guys, we don't even know where the Mario Bros are, for all we know they could've been sent to the moon!

Bowser: Yoshi, you don't get to talk.

Yoshi: Oh yeah? What are you going to do about it?

Peach: Guys! We don't need this right now.

Yoshi: I say we forget about the Marios they can take care of themselves. I say we look for Birdo!

Daisy: Oh, yeah we're going to be sooooo much help without the Marios!

Wario: Yoshi, you must be forgetting…Birdo's getting an ARMY!

Yoshi: I know, I've got an idea…

Wario: YAY! Now all we need is for Bowser to get an idea and all of will have thunk at least once!

Bowser punched Wario on the head, knocking him out.

Bowser: Thunk isn't a word! Idiot.

Peach: Does anybody have an idea.

Yoshi: Yes! Birdo's going to get an army, right?

Daisy: Yes, we just said that, get to the point…

Yoshi: So why don't we get an army of our own, we'll split up and get ourselves our own armies.

The five of them ran off in different directions, even Wario who was out cold.

Meanwhile in Subcon

Birdo is standing on the cloud you fight her on in level 1-1.

Birdo: Attention citizens of Subcon! I, Birdo, am here to tell you that NOW is the time to avenge ourselves form the Marios! Now, is the time we infiltrate their worlds like they infiltrated ours! Now, is the time we bring respect back to Subcon! Shy Guys! Snifits! Tweeters! Pidgits! Buzzoes! And the rest of you! Now, we shall destroy them, like they destroyed us!

Some Random Shy Guy (SRSG): But, what if we lose?

Birdo: Don't worry, they're defenseless, they've lost the Marios!

SRSG: But, they've got thousands of residents on their world…

Birdo: So do we.

SRSG: But, we had thousands of people last time, and they were able to get through with only four people…

Birdo: Three of which are dead…

SRSG: But-

Birdo: Enough questions! We're going into battle some of you will die, but I will not so that's a chance I'm going to make!

Crowd: Yay?

Birdo: We're going into battle as nobodies, and I'm coming out a hero, the rest of you might not even come out.

Crowd: Umm,

Birdo: But! Despite what people think of us, despite the odds, we must go into battle!

Crowd: Umm, why is that again…exactly?

Birdo: But of course you realize…this means war!

MM174: Ooh! This is getting interesting! Does the Mushroom Kingdom stand a chance without their beloved hero…oh and Luigi? Will Birdo be able to destroy Nintendo World? Will I ever finish this story? And whatever happened to Bob Johnson?

Meanwhile in Toad Town

Bob Johnson slowly walks into the destroyed city.

Bob: Hello?

Suddenly dozens of hundreds of Chain Chomps appear from nowhere.

Bob: Oh, um, hi?

Chomp Leader: Bark…bark…BARK!!!

Translation: Wait for it…wait…NOW!!!

All of the Chomps lunge at Bob, whom runs away as fast as he can.

Bob: AHHHHHHH!

Chomps: BARK! Bark! Bark! BaRk!

Translation: HE'S MINE! No mine! Mine! NoOo MiNe!

MM174: Looks like everyone's getting into stupid situations. I forgot to tell you, I don't own Bob Johnson either, my friend made him, and I thought it was funny so I put him in a story.


	10. Climatic Chase Part 4

Disclaimer: None of this is mine, none of the characters, the environment or anything else that hasn't been mine the past 10 chapters.

Mario's Murder Mystery

Chapter 10: The Climatic Chase Part 4

As he Mario Brothers lay helpless at the bottom of the cliff, Luigi got up, unscratched, unbruised, and unhurt.

Luigi: Wait a second, Mario, I just remembered, we don't suffer falling damage.

Mario: Oh, yeah.

The brothers got up looked to the top of the mountain to the Police/Lawyer Pianta jumping up and down angrily. Until the mountain crumbled of course. The edge of the cliff fell to the ground Police/Lawyer Pianta on top. The Pianta got up and shook off some dirt.

Police/Lawyer Pianta: You there! STOP!

Mario: MAMA MIA! Luigi! Let's Split up!

The two brothers immediately sprung to their feet and ran off in two separate directions.

Meanwhile in the now Chain Chomp free Toad Town (Bob Johnson took them all)

Peach: Attention EVERYONE! I need your help! Everyone from Toads, to Koopas to the dead remains of Shy Guys from Paper Mario the Original! I need your help!

Toad: Um, Peach, I'm the only one left…all the Chain Chomps either scared away or ate everyone else.

Peach: Oh, oh well. I guess that's not too bad, at least I have someone…

Meanwhile in Sarasaland

Daisy: Attention Sarasaland people! I need your help!

No response.

Daisy: Hello? Anyone?

Still no response.

Daisy: Crap! I forgot, everyone left my kingdom after Tatanga attacked…

Meanwhile again, in Yoshi's Island

Yoshi: My fellow Yoshis! I need your help to kill a most deadly killer!

Red Yoshi: Yoshi? Yoshi, Yoshi Yoshi Yoshi!

Translation: Killer? Wait, what killer?

Yoshi: Birdo! She's trying to kill me and other people and stuff.

Yellow Yoshi: Yoshi Yoshi Yoshi!

Translation: But I thought we liked Birdo!

Blue Yoshi: Yoshi, Yoshi!

Translation: Wait, why aren't we helping her?

Pink Yoshi: Yoshi! GRRR! AH WA WA!

Translation: Kill! DESTROY! HA HA HA!

Yellow Yoshi: Yoshi…Yoshi. Yoshi!?!

Translation: Hmm…On second thought. Let's stay here and eat.

Meanwhile again in who cares ville.

Wario: Bob-Ombs, today we go to war against the tyranny that is, BIRDO!

Bob-Ombs: Yeah!

Wario: Today, we avenge Toadette, Toad, DK and the Marios for being killed because of Birdo!

Bob-Ombs: YEAH!

Wario: Toady we destroy Birdo and the rest of her Subcon gang! Now who's with me!?!

Bob-Ombs: YEAH!!!

The hundreds of Bob-Ombs got so excited the blew up as Bob-Ombs often do. Leaving Wario a black, charred up dead body, that's right, Wario's dead.

Meanwhile again, in the Koopa Kingdom

Bowser: Now instead of killing Mario, we must kill Birdo! Ok? Mario's our ally for now, and after we kill Birdo and her gang, we outta kill Mario too.

Goomba: Bowser's working WITH Mario.

Koopa Troopa: That makes him an enemy to the Koopa Troop.

Bowser: Oh, boy I don't like where this is going…

The thousands of Goombas, Koopas, Winged enemies, Boos, etc. attacked Bowser. However, them being the idiots they are, killed themselves somehow.

Bowser: Wow, that was embarrassing. Asses. Well, I guess I'd better get going.

Bowser began to leave back to the Mushroom Kingdom, but a lava geyser randomly shot lava at him, killing him.

Meanwhile in Subcon

Birdo had a huge army of Subconians, including Tweeters, Pidgits, Shy Guys, Bezzoes, Pokeys, and a whole cast of other enemies whom I cannot think of off the top of my head.

As Birdo led the tens of hundreds of thousands of millions of billions of trillions. Ok, I'm exaggerating a little, but believe me, there were a lot of enemies! As Birdo led the thousands of enemies toward the door to the Mushroom Kingdom, Mario and Luigi raced to arrive at the scene on time. Meanwhile Peach and the gang were headed back to the door, with the army of one Toad.

MM174: How will Mario and the others win? They have an army of one…and Birdo has an army of a lot more…

Audience person: Hey wait, I thought Toad was dead!

MM174: Uhh…I know you are but what am I?


	11. Climatic Chase Climax

Disclaimer: None of this is mine! So live with it!

AN: YAY! Last chapter! WOOT!

Mario's Murder Mystery

Chapter 11: Climatic Chase Climax

In the Red corner we have: Two plumbing brothers, two princesses, a dinosaur and a mushroom

And in the Blue corner we have: A dinosaur and a hell lot of other people.

Looks like the Red corner's gonna get its ass whooped.

Mario and Luigi arrived at the entrance to Subcon, a door randomly placed in a park where Mario, Luigi, Peach and Toad were going to have a picnic a long time ago. Soon after the Marios arrived Peach, Daisy and Yoshi arrived a long with a single Toad.

Yoshi: None of the Yoshis will help.

Daisy: I didn't have anyone to help either.

Peach: I got him.

Peach pointed at the lone Toad. Suddenly, there came a rumbling from the other side of the door, as an army of 867,842 enemies, plus Birdo plowed through the door! The Door swung open and flew away, smashing into the Toad creating a gooey, bloody and gory mess of dead Toad #2.

Mario: We're dead.

Peach: Run!

Yoshi: There's nowhere to run!

Luigi: What do we do!?!

Daisy: Just try to stay alive!

An ostrich came and ran over Daisy, killing her.

Mario: Damn! It's 4 against 867,843 including Birdo!

Luigi: We're screwed.

??? (not the same ??? From a couple chapters ago but a different ???): NO! There is another way!

Mario: Who's that?

Luigi: It's, it's

Yoshi: A bird?

Peach: A plane?

Mario: NO! A Power Star! Here to save the day.

A bright yellow shinning star landed in Mario's hands. Mario held it high above his head, and the star flew into the sky. It gave off a brilliant light and…

Luigi: It's working!

Peach: We may live after all!

Yoshi: I'll live to eat another day!

Mario: We're going to win!

The Star began to shine blindingly now and right before the day was saved, a Bezzo came out of nowhere and broke the star with its pointy thing.

Birdo: HA HA HA! Idiotic morons! You think a stupid star can stop me!

Mario: NO! This can't happen! We're the good guys!

Suddenly, again, another hope came!

Wart (he's the ??? From a couple chapters ago) appeared and ate Birdo!

Wart: You really thought I was going to GIVE you my army after you failed me so many times in SMB2!?! NO! I was just using you to get my army this far! Now I will destroy the Marios!

Mario: Why did you need to use her?

Wart: Because. Now die!

As all the enemies got in line and prepared to attack Wart's eyes narrowed,

Wart: ATTACK!!!

The hundreds of thousands of enemies flew around, the three remaining heroes and one heroin were able to easily dodge around all the attackers, but for how long. As the heroes thought all hope was lost…the ground began to shake. Everyone stopped in the tracks. And looked into the distance to see…Bob Johnson riding atop hundreds of thousands of Chain Chomps.

Wart: What the? Huh! RETREAT!!! EVERYONE BACK IN SUBCON! ARGH! NO ONE BUT ME FIRST!

As Wart and his entire army retreated back into Subcon, there was one major flaw in there plan they forgot about, the door was blown clear off, so the Chomps simply chased them through the door. All except the one Bob was riding. As the four heroes plus Bob, the true hero turned away from the doorway, they could hear screaming, and blood was being flung around through the doorway. Along with several random Subconian parts.

Mario: We…won!?!

Luigi: We did it! We found out the killer, and killed her!

Yoshi: WAH HOO!

Peach: Yes! Too bad pretty much everyone else has died…

Luigi: Oh well…we'll worry about that later. For now, I'm going to bed….

Mario: Me too.

Peach: Ok, see you guys later.

Yoshi: I guess I'd better return to my island…

MM174: And so the four heroes plus Bob lived happily ever after, at least until Chapter 12.


	12. THE END

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters.

Mario's Murder Mystery

Chapter 12: The End

As the Mario brothers lay in bed, watching TV, Luigi couldn't think of anything but questions.

Luigi: Hey, Mario, how exactly did Bob end up here again.

Mario: Hmm, I don't know, I guess it was just a writer's convenience.

Luigi: Hmm, well, whatever happened to that Police/Lawyer Pianta guy, he was chasing us, then he vanished.

Mario: Hmm, I don't know, he must've taken a wrong turn at Albuquerque

Luigi: Whatever, HEY! Wait a second! Why don't we revive everyone with 1-UP Mushrooms?

Mario: Aww, do we have to? I'm too tired and slightly lazy.

Luigi: …I'll call Yoshi and tell him to do it.

AN: Well, there you have it, I finished my first story! YAY! Anyway, I was planning on having Birdo be the killer the whole time, that's why her alibi is different. Well, see you in some other story. Bye for now…


End file.
